Random Tuesday Thoughts

*whew*
I made it thru the holidays...
largely w/o booze..lol..my mom did bring some kick ass wine to xmas eve tho..Almondine I think it was called?
It has a lovely almond after taste..yum.

OK so onto random thuesday thoughts :)

1-I am kidless tonight..and what are we doing? NADA. that just seems wrong...

2-anyone else find the Progressive Insurance commercials annoying??? I do..I wanna take Flo & her tricked out name tag and ship them to Bora-Bora (wherever that may be..)

3-I am making an extraordinary amount of typos tonight...seriously..if I didn't correct myself it would look like a drunken 6 year old typed it..

4-my hair needs cut.

5-the kids got Nintendo DS's for xmas..and I am GEEKED out over Zelda..lol...I think I have played it more than Gav..I am serious...looking up cheats online and everything. see? geek...

6-I made up a new word..awesomely...lol..(OK so my spell checker says it is a word...but none the less...)

7-my shoulder feels awesomely (new word alert!) PT is almost over...woooo!

8-my crazy neighbors are breaking up..which means The Spawn is going to be moving coz his dad is filing for custody (rightly so since she is a drunk who refuses to dry out & she is mean ...) lets pray for a quick foreclosure so I can get new NICE neighbors...or less crazy..which ever..anything is better than what we got now..lol..

9-I have lost TWO Ulta eyeliners in the last 2 months...TWO. WTF??? they are they nice ones...plastic where you turn it to get the eyeliner out...never runs...I am so annoyed..I have to FIND them. and fast.

10- i'm hungry. and wanna go get a beer (or a Woodchuck cider which is my equivalent)

ETA check out The Un-Mom- the originator of Random Tuesday Thoughts..she has spiders trying to fall into her chilled red wine..(shhhh don't tell the wine police...)

why I LOVE my birthday!

see, I am a HUGE geek about my birthday...even at 34.
It is a day I can reflect on myself and who I have become...
I can remember w/ fondness my past birthdays..and know I am wiser now...
age is but a number to me..I don't feel any older now than when I was 18...wiser-HELL yeah, older not so much...
It is a day where I can feel giddy about a passing year...feel all excited because it is the anniversary of the date i entered the world, and made it a better place!!
and lets not forget the PRESENTS..and the dinner we always go out for..
even tho it IS 6 days before Xmas..it is STILL special to me..my mom ALWAYS went out of her way to make it fun, and a BIRTHDAY despite being so close to Xmas (she always had a party for me..now granted, I had my presents under the Xmas tree..heh..THAT was cool tho..) she always said it wasn't like I asked to be born so close to a major holiday..(even tho I was THREE weeks late..my due Date was 12/1!!)
My presents were ALWAYS wrapped in bday paper and not xmas (not so much now..she is slacking..lmao..)
& I always got SEPARATE gifts...never got ripped off..

I am a Sagittarius..on the cusp of Capricorn..I have Taurus rising which makes me more of a homebody...Sag's are typically lucky people, which I am to a degree, and klutzy, which is me..heh..TOTALLY.
We have happy go lucky..exhuberant and generally fun to be around..I am adventerous, social (sometimes..lol..) and know a little bit about everything, b.c I LOVE to learn..anything.
I have great comic timing...and remember WAY too many things..my ruling planet is Jupiter..hence the luck...I am a Fire sign, which you would know if you knewmy temper..lol..takes quite a lot to piss me off,but oohh buddy when I do go off..NOT fun...
I am very intense..& I hate to be penned in by anyone for any reason..jealousy sucks..lol..and i am not jealous by any means..
I am open minded by and large..and a live and let live kinda person..I am spontaneous too...AND very positive!! I love to give gifts ;)

of course, this sign has its bad sides too...we can embarrass our loved ones by accident by replaying their silly moments...we can also be tactless...I tend to like to spend money...sometimes frivolously..and I LOVE to accumulate stuff..also bad..lol..I can be moralistic sometimes to a dangerous fault..and I can be too free w/ my opnions..and WAY too honest sometimes...the small details in life always get me...lol..chores suck and have a horrible time making myself do things!

I found this is a description of Sag's Sagittarius governs the hips, thighs and sacral area; some astrologers consider Sagittarians as tending to suffer from ailments of the hips and thighs and being prone to sciatica and rheumatism.
THIS makes sense since my hips & thighs are well. bountiful..lmao...
my gemstone is Turquoise..which is good luck for me..and i love it ;)


OK so tonight I am going gambling at Mountaineer...yay! It is going to be fun...hopefully I will hit big..and Tom. I am going to do my bday dinner w/ the fam...

OK enough geekiness from me!!
I am off to get ready!!

THIS is a funny worthy of my attitude

more animals

Me and where i have been

bleh.
It has not been a fun place in my addled brain...
this will get a tad heavy, so be warned..

I do suffer from depression (currently held in check w/ cymbalta...) and ADD, which is not being treated at the moment due to BP issues, I am hoping to get back on those wonderful meds soon...since my BP is under control now..

My marriage has been in a rough patch for a good year now, that brought on alot of reflection on my part..and then the bottom fell out...
not that it is horrible here, I am just now coming to the realization of HOW HARD being married is...and in specific to my husband, god knows he is a good man, but he has as many issues as I do, as different as they are, they are just as serious..and our issues together do not make for much fun.
He is a very particular person, a neat freak some may say, and has NO clue how to dissipate stress, and it builds too much in him..and he lashes out in a way that is impossible for me to deal with..he goes on a neatness rampage, which for me is NOT good. the ADD In me makes me want to be a pack rat..I fight it, but it is a struggle...and thus you see the crux of my problem...

I have come to realize in the past few weeks that he is NEVER going to change and that is scary to me..and has led me to wonder if I CAN be here with him in all of this for the rest of my life...
hence the depression wheedling its way back in...
I am honestly not sure where this is all going to go..
I do know that I love him still, and don't want to be w/o him, but do I have what I need to have IN MYSELF to deal w/ it for 50 years..I don't know...
bleh.
I have to work thru it within ME before I can go to him with it...and that is hard....
and what is scarier, is that *I* am the steadying force in this house..ME, major depression DX'd, ADD addled me..(also ruled by my hormonesm once a month...)
I am the one who has to maintain a calm level head...and that my friends, is truly frightening...
and very difficult..

add into that my eldest son, who is struggling in school, and has finally been given an IEP for his reading comprehnsion...FINALLY after 3 rounds of testing over 5 years of school...that is a relief on one hand and on the other hand, it raises Mommy Guilt..could i Have done more for him, can I really get my ass on the ball, mommy guilt is ugly. Is it MY genetics that have led him here..is it MY failings that have led him here...and on & on...

SO that is where I have been, buried within the depths of my mind, for weeks..not fun I say not fun at all..

enough heavy shit for now...

Akk techinical difficulties!?!?!

Wow.
HOW in the HELL did those 2 blog images end up on my header??
This is the one thing I hate about changing templates...gggrrrr

Random Tuesday Thoughts

Im bbbaaaacccckkkkkkk!
long story as to why I have been absent, but rest assured it doesn't involve alien abduction or death...I will fill you all in later on today...

and I am back for Random Tuesday Thoughts! Yay!

I am SO not done w/ my xmas shopping...not even SLIGHTLY close....money is TIGHT this year and I am giving myself a stomach ulcer trying to figure out how to make it all work

My birthday is FRIDAY! w00t baby! I am a huge geek and LOVE my birthday....love it. I will be 34 this year and doesn't bother me a bit!

I am going to a Casino for some penny slots too- coincidentally it is on my bday, (we planned it as a holiday outing, but it ended up being on my bday..hehe....)

I absolutely LOVE snow. it is SO pretty...makes the world appear clean and new. Then it melts and gets dirty and looks nasty....I am done w/ it by Feb...

It is 8:22 am and I Have to leave the house at 9 and I am NOT showered or dressed.

Since I am a hairstylist, I can do my hair when I get to work..it is SO awesome. I can also paint my nails when it is slow..hehe....

I have yet to see A Christmas Story this year..I love that movie!! it is so awesome...

My OVEN is fixed and functional after a WHOLE year of being busted...I have sorely missed it!!!

I am glad to be back in the Blogoverse..missed you all!